grumpy

[written 01/27/04]

hi ~

oh things are going so well for me right now—school is great and so far with this quarter no real pressure, work is ok, i saw my family recently, i have a great little apartment, two very sweet cats, a small group of good friends that i love to make laugh and laugh with, a sweet boy asleep on my couch right now, a full fridge, great books to read all around me, a fast fast computer, one of the best showers in the world, and i could go on and on.

so why am i so grumpy in the mornings, getting up for school or work? i go to sleep too late because i’m trying to cram all this cool stuff i want to do into the hours after work/school and sleep—but for a few years i had the option of doing whatever i wanted whenever i wanted. which was awesome and a shame that, in a way, i wasted a lot of that time, being unhappy and cold in a large old wherehouse, or a messy and dirty “communal” house. and now, when i have such a great setup, ijust don’t have the time to be reading for hours and hours like i used to. sigh.

and i guess cause of that, i get a tad (ha!) grumpy in the morning and feel really sorry for myself and feel too much like an adult with responsibilties and i don’t like that. well!

.. on to happier news—i’ve gotten some very nice emails from friends, particularly caroline and nicole, and they make me laught and feel verrrry special! love it! another thing i need to learn to do better is remember how much i like having friends. that might seem like a weird comment but really i’m such an introvert and also so busy time-wise that i forget how important it is to make time for friends. because when i’m hanging out with them, i love love it! but it’s so easy for me to be very hull-ish (don’t deny it, we hulls are kinda introverted in a family-cliquey way) and just wanna hibernate in my room.

regarding this website: big changes are on the horizon. i finally got my future reading list app to work just about the way i want it to, which is super exciting—when i got it to work last night, i was jumping around the apartment pumping my fists in the air. tonight i totally revamped and updated my links page. also, i’m having fun with my resume, just to see what i’ve been doing and how it looks all lined up. where do i add activist stuff like food not bombs, or a-collectiv, or any of that essential but relevant? stuff….

oh! and congrats luci and claudi on being fantastic runners!

all in all, i love my life! good night!

p.s. i saw the station agent the other day and it was beautiful! go see it! it’s best to see as a matinee cause then you have the whole rest of the day to savor it. plus, when you step outside of the theatre, after the movie, you’ll be so happy it’s still daylight and the sky will look so blue and beautiful! or cloudy and gorgeous!..